


Finally Letting Go

by afteriwake



Series: Many Loves [3]
Category: CSI: NY
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, One-sided Conversation, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Sad Danny, graves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-13
Updated: 2017-11-13
Packaged: 2019-02-01 18:12:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12710241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afteriwake/pseuds/afteriwake
Summary: Danny goes to visit Aiden's grave.





	Finally Letting Go

**Author's Note:**

> Here's another one! **darknesshaunts** suggested love and angst go hand in hand, and as one of the **stagesoflove** prompts for the round I claimed Danny for had " _Love #3 (love for a friend who's died)_ " as one of the " _Five Loves_ " prompts, I couldn't pick anyone other than Aiden. Also an answer to the **2x5obsessions** prompt " _a black shirt_."

He wondered if it was strange he was going back to her grave so soon. He just...he didn't know why, but after everything, he needed to go there. He missed her. He was closer to her than anyone else on the team, and now that she was gone, now that Pratt was in jail...

Well, even after all that, he still missed her.

He'd changed into a black shirt after leaving Louie's bedside. It didn't feel right to him not to go there in a black shirt, for some reason. He'd picked up flowers, too, from a vendor on the way to the cemetery. He liked to imagine she was looking down and laughing at him for getting overcharged on the transaction. The thought made him smile.

He made his way to her grave. He hadn't come by here since the funeral. He'd done a lot of his grieving in private because at least that way he could break down and not worry about someone else worrying about it. Aiden had worried about him enough; he didn't need someone else taking over.

Her father had picked a good place to bury her. The team had chipped in money, taken up a collection, and there was a bench there, too. Aiden's father had cried when Danny had told him they were doing that.

He sat on the bench and laid down the roses. He wasn't sure whether he was just going to sit there and reminisce, or talk to her like she was there...he'd been pretty lucky that those close to him hadn't been hurt or killed until recently. The last few weeks had started to make him wonder what he'd done to piss God off so much.

"You know, I'm really hoping you're one of those guardian angels now because it'd be nice to know someone up there's on my side," he said to her headstone. That settled that...he was going to talk to her.

"If you...if you were here, I'd be yelling at you, telling you how monumentally stupid what you were doing was, Aiden. But you're not. And I won't yell. But after _all_ that time you spent worrying about _me_ , why didn't you let me worry about _you_? Why'd you have to be so tough?"

He took a deep breath, looked up at the sky. "We had good times. Even after you had to go. And...you know, this is actually a hell of a lot easier to deal with because it's final, you know? No matter how much I wish it was different, you aren't coming back. I can deal with that. I just remember the good times...that makes it easier."

He thought for a moment. "I didn't know you had a will. I didn't know you were going to leave me anything. I'd rather have you here, I mean...but... I put the pictures up. You were right; my place does look better with a few pictures up. The other stuff, I can't go through it now. I don't even know what's in the box, but that's one big box. Maybe I'll be able to go through it soon, you know?"

He looked down, caught his shirt in his view. Aiden had commented once she liked that shirt. Maybe that's why he was wearing it. Things that reminded him of her brought him comfort. And comfort was something he needed right now.

"I'll be back. I'll probably come back a lot until things in my head get sorted out. And if I go a while between visits, it's not because I've forgotten you. I'm warning you now so that if I end up in Heaven you don't start yelling at me." He smiled a small half-grin. "Funny. I'd stopped worrying about whether I was going to Heaven or not until recently. Now I want to know where I'm going to end up. Even Hell wouldn't be that bad if you were around, you know?"

He stood up, walked away, and then stopped and turned back. "But you're in Heaven, right? Because there's no way..."

He let the sentence trail off as a gust of wind hit. "Yeah, I kind of figured." He turned around again and walked away from the headstone and made his way back to the world of the living.


End file.
